*me, still insane* “I used to be sooooo crazy “
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really jealous of people who can just... do things. like they dont go through the 39 stages of grief before and the 47 stages of grief after. they just do it like its some adidas commercial. like the spirit of shia laboeuf possessed them. still sounds fake to me but whatever. good for them ig
i’ve seen how detrimental basing your entire identity around a person can be. the moment you identify yourself as someone’s girlfriend, mother, whatever, you are truly shooting yourself in the foot. nothing screams codependency more than getting joy through the existence of somebody else. especially w how volatile humans are. it’s the very definition of not having security in yourself
people get so defensive about this topic and immediately go “people are not ISLANDS” like that’s literally not the point. i refuse to rely on somebody else for happiness, and i love being around people. these things can coexist. not wanting to rely on people does not mean you’re dooming yourself to solitariness. it’s more so that people are shaky by nature. they always ebb and flow. and whenever they do, you find yourself spiraling bc the foundation of your being (a person) just shifted. it just doesn’t work. that’s where the healthy idea of self-love comes from: from having that foundation in yourself. everyone else just builds off of it, rather than build it